Breathe. Breathe. Breathe…phewwwwwww. I let out a long breath. “Mom I’m really nervous.” I say in a tone that screams “HELP ME!”, “Boo, there’s nothing to be scared of.” She says to me. I’m immediately calmed by her confidence in me. I get in the car, unsure of myself, my body feeling like a heap of bricks being dragged along by my head. The world glowing outside of me, euphoria takes over; soon nervousness turns into sheer excitement. I park the car in east Jesus because I don’t want to pay for parking, and I walk into the subway while listening to my iPod, my feet hitting every beat, this gives me a sense of security. Who couldn’t like a boy that can walk in rhythm? The ridiculous thought crosses my mind, but is soon pushed out by the antiquated ticket kiosks.
Ticket in hand, hair done, face shaved, contacts in, spiffiest clothes on, I step onto the train platform…waiting. I close my eyes, the euphoria has not worn off, I feel the January air in my lungs, it even burns a little, but I don’t mind…not now…not today. Honk! Honk! Honk! The driver gives a warning to the waiting passengers that the train is coming. I step onto the train. I sit down at a window seat. I breathe again. Oh crap! I’m nervous again. Alright count to 10…1, 2, 3….SHIT! What’s the rest?! I decide that counting to 10 requires too much effort, so I turn on some soothing music. Again I am calm. I remember my mom’s confidence and miraculously I remember my own confidence as well. I step off of the train. Exit. Stairs. Looking. Searching. Where is he? A moment of panic comes over me. I start to pace. Alright maybe I’m waiting in the wrong place. I start to walk up the stairs, as I am doing so I notice that the guy walking a little in front of me has a nice butt. Oddly enough this calms me. I get to the top of the stairs. And I see him. I see my date, the boy I was walking behind. We wave to each other and huge smiles creep up on our faces. I ponder the fact that this is both of our first dates. How is it going to go? I think so hard it almost comes out of my mouth. We give each other a hug. We have some small talk on the way to the movie theatre to buy the tickets. My thoughts take a break from the conversation, Attributes: he’s cute as all hell, he’s funny, he’s got great big blue eyes, he’s smart, and HE’S GOT A NICE BUTT!! I immediately decide that tonight is going to go great.
We get our tickets to Sherlock Holmes. “I’ve already seen it.” He tells me. “Oh well it must be good.” I say back to him. “Well not only is it great but I’m pretty sure that Watson and Holmes are gay lovers…you’ll see.” He tells me with a slightly mischievous smile on his face. I find that I too am wearing a smile bigger than I care to explain. We get in the movie theatre and we choose seats in the middle. “There’s a real science to sitting in the right place at the movies.” He tells me, “Oh yeah? Is that gonna be your major in college?” I say back to him playfully. “No No, I plan on getting my degree in making movie popcorn, you have to go to medical school for that one because you could kill someone with all the butter.” He says to me with a perfectly straight face and a gleam in his eye. I let out a loud HAHAHAHA! Thank god he soon joins me. The lights dim. The movie starts.
About two hours later the theatre doors open. We walk out satisfied by the movie. “You were right…those two are totally gay.” I admit to him. “See. I hope they kiss in the next one.” He thinks out loud. “Well since you were right I guess I’m going to have to buy dinner.” I say very matter of factly. “No way you’re paying for dinner! There is only one way to settle this…” he tells me “rock, paper, scissors.” I laugh as I agree. Rock. Paper. Scissors. SHOOT! He wins. We get into Chipotle. And we order our food. We sit down and we start to talk. We tell each other about ourselves. We talk about things going on in the world. All the while not paying attention to our food. After staying there so long that we felt they would ask us to leave we decided to go and get a quiet cup of tea.
Finally I can look at him, listen to him without all the noise of the world around. Finally I get to stare into those big blue eyes and dream. We talk about books, movies, TV shows, the news, all of it! We both have such a deep and wonderful love for all of them that we go on for hours. We notice each other getting lost in the conversation, getting lost in each other. We can’t help but blush. We can’t help but giggle.
After about a six hour date it was time to say our goodbyes. He walked me to the subway station. I didn’t know what to expect. A hug? A Kiss? What do I do? Will he kiss me? Or should I kiss him? Or should we just hug each other? These thoughts coarse through my head. We get to the escalator. It’s time to say goodbye for now. We stand there for a few seconds, both unsure of what to do. I go in for a hug and we hug for a good while. Then I decide to save the kiss for the second date. When all of a sudden he cups my face gently and kisses me. Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! I try and think about how this feels but I conclude that it feels oh my god. Our lips separate and we look at each other. We immediately smile once our eyes meet. Before I leave he gives me one more hug and says “Well…away we go.”
With that one phrase I knew exactly what he was thinking. This is going to be quite an adventure…